An excerpt from

The Island in Winter
by Terrence Young

TEN YEARS AFTER HIS DEATH I EXAMINE A FEW LESSONS
MY FATHER TAUGHT ME


A cheese slice is not a slice of cheese.
Red sky at night means nothing.
Close all gates behind you.

Hemp has more honour than nylon
but any rope is your friend.
Buy British.

Spit on the whetstone
before applying the blade,
No matter what the traffic's like, pass.

If asked, you may admit
to being an Anglican. Never offer
this information.

The fact that you live
in North America
does not make you an American.

Weatherman should not tell jokes.
An apple's colour is no indication
of ripeness, but the colour of its seeds is.

Dogs deserve more than city life,
cats don't.
Oil everything.

Exercise is for people
who don't know what work is.
In the woods, only a fool keeps his hands in his pockets.

Of all roses, the Peace.
Of all virtues, duty.
Of all music, Gilbert and Sullivan.

A clerk's job is to serve you.
In a war, you want the Ghurkas on your side.
Feather your oars between strokes.

If you have to blow on a fire,
you are doing something wrong.
A lazy man's load is not a hard concept.

Peanut butter is not a breakfast food.
Lieutenant has only one pronunciation
In English.

Gravy, but only if there is no horeradish.
An alder branch will make a good whistle.
Keep your beer in the basement, not in the fridge.

For their scent sweet peas.
For your Christmas tree, balsam.
For a treat, rock candy.

Sex is your own affair.
Always pay cash.
Visit the dead.